Today marks one week since my precious Emryn Selah was separated from my womb. As I continue to draw near to the throne of God, I have found grace upon grace to help in my time of need (Hebrews 4:16). As you allow me to share my story, I want you to know that this same grace is available to you for free. No matter what you are facing, you cannot outrun grace. Last Saturday evening, I prayed in quiet that God would restore to me the joy of my salvation. Life just gets hectic sometimes, or so I thought. And, on Monday evening, I found out our sweet baby girl’s heart had stopped beating at 19 weeks. I told God immediately that this did not feel good, that this did not feel like the promises in His Word I believe for my family, and I told Him that this, for sure, did not feel like He was restoring the joy of my salvation. Yet, somehow, through it all, He really has. Emryn Selah, your birth was not a death. You are resting in perfect peace, the only world you have ever known. And, your birth, even through all the pain and sadness of my shattered heart, brought back the joy of my salvation. Just by Grace.
I love you, Meredith!